We don't send postcards usually, we post them here.

Sunday 1 February 2009

Warning to all applicants!



I'm sure all 30,000 of you have done all of your homework, but goodness me from what I've seen very few of you will be equipped at all to deal with the Whitsunday Yellow Bellied Gulper!

It's not that I want to put you off or anything, but make sure you've got your affairs in order before you come won't you. It would be a good time to make up with that long lost brother and let bygones be bygones.

While you've all been dreaming of sunny skies and crystal clear waters, the brochures don't tell you about the dangers, do they?

Try to find some statistics on Shark attack on the Great Barrier Reef for instance, you won't find any.

Why? Because the crocodiles have eaten them all.

Don't believe me? Why do you think there are all those conditions in the terms of employment? The MEDICAL insurance ones I mean?

OHHH yes people, it's a very scary place, best left to, well, people like me really!

I'm sure it won't be too hard to withdraw your application discreetly...
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